You might be a redneck if, your wife's hairdo was ever ruined by a ceiling fan!
You might be a redneck if, you refuse to slide during a softball game because you don't want to crush your cigarettes!
You might be a redneck if, you're mowing your lawn and find a car.
You might be a redneck If, you were shooting pool when any of your children were born!
You might be a redneck if, you were conceived, born and taught on a pool table.
You might be a redneck if, the interviewer asks, '"Did you know that we are a Fortune 500 Company?'" And you answer, '"What track do y'all sponsor that race at? I ain't been to that one yet."
You might be a redneck If, you've ever been involved in a custody fight over a dog!
You are a redneck if your prom date is your brother, or if you went to the prom in your father's pickup truck!
You might be a Redneck if you use the same tree your dog does!