A lawyer lies dying, his partner of 40years by his bedside. "Jack, I've got to confess. I've been sleeping with your wifefor 30 years and I'm the father of your daughter, Hillary. On top of that, I've beenstealing from the firm for a decade."
"Relax," says Jack, "anddon't think another thing about it. I'm the one who put arsenic in your martini."