1. A right lane construction closure is just a game to see h...
1. A right lane construction closure is just a game to see how many

people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in the

left lane waiting for the same jerks to squeeze their way back in

before hitting the orange construction barrels.



2. Turn signals are clues as to your next move. It's important that

you never use them.



3. Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between

you and the car in front of you or the space will be filled in by

somebody else putting you in an even more dangerous situation.



4. Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane change is considered,

"going with the flow."



5. The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance

you have of getting hit.



6. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to insure that

your ABS kicks in giving a nice relaxing foot massage as the brake

pedal pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to

stretch your legs.



7. Construction signs tell you about road closures immediately after

you pass the last exit before the traffic begins to back up.


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