"Four years ago, my cousin ran for state senator."
"What's he do now?"
"Nothing. He got elected."
Why don't we ever hear of a thief burglarizing a politician's house?
Professional courtesy.
Mom: What makes you think our son will be a politician?
Dad: He says more things that sound good and mean nothing than any other boy on the block.
A political pollster knocked on the door and a sour-faced lady answered.
"What party does your husband belong to?" he asked.
The lady responded curtly, "I, sir, am the party he belongs to."
A bus full of politicians was speeding down a country road when it swerved into a field and crashed into a tree. The farmer who owned the field went over to investigate. Then he dug a hole and buried the politicians.
A few days later the sheriff drove by and saw the overturned bus. He knocked on the farmhouse door and asked where all the politicians had gone. The farmer said he had buried them. "They were all dead?" the sheriff asked.
"Well, some of them said they weren't," replied the farmer, "but you know how politicians lie."
A high-priced call girl brings a customer to her fancy apartment. He admires the fancy furnishings and the art and asks how she was able to amass such splendor. She replies that those really were her father's, that he was a politician for forty years.
He said, "How come you didn't follow in his footsteps instead of choosing this way of life?"
She sighed and said, "Oh, just lucky I guess. Besides, I had my moral standards to uphold."
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